Archive for Personal Development
Self Reflection as We Wrap Up 2010
Posted by: | CommentsHey hey,
Hmm, as we get to the end of yet another year, it’s always good to do a bit of introspection.
You look at how you (hopefully) have transformed into someone (also hopefully) better than you were a year ago. Acknowledge EVERYTHING that’s happened this year, whether they were things that made you laugh, made you cry, took you down, picked you up, elevated you, hurt you, made you look good or bad, ALL of it for it is that entirety that got you to where you are now… and made the year what it was.
Looking at the past year (and specifically the past few months) I made a key discovery I’d like to share with you.
Screw Social Norms & Expectations – Rise Above It
It is our nature, as social animals, to well… abide by “social norms”, to do what others do and to THINK what others think. This helps structure a cohesive society and serves its purpose…
The problem is, too many of us stick to this far too stringently, not allowing ourselves the freedom to stray from the pack once in a while, not allowing us to BE whom we were destined to be and instead… we end up BEING just another predictable boring drone (“sheeple” as I like to call them… ya know, SHEEP + people). We end up allowing society, which is made of mediocre people, shape us into who we are and who we will ever become.
*shakes head*
Advancement in society is done by the extremists, the ones that DON’T play by the rules (all the time), that think outside of the box, that challenges the “social norm”. Think about it, if we ALL thought and did the same thing, there would be absolutely no room for creativity and as such, no room for advancement and discoveries.
F**k that.
I say challenge yourself and stop thinking like a sheeple (at least once in a while…)
Ditch what you think SHOULD be and instead, think what COULD be, because odds are, that “SHOULD” is shaped by social expectations and norms setup by folks who never thought of a different way of doing/being, who didn’t have the cojones to try something different, to risk being someone greater.
STOP doing something and STOP being someone just because that’s what you think the society thinks you should do/be.
Case in Point
One particular “sheeple” philosophy that seems to have come up a few times in my discussions with various people in the past year has to do with time.
Our concept of time and how long something should take seem to be largely influenced by social norms.
For example, “I need to work until I am 72 to retire.” “It’ll take me four years to get my college degree.” “I need 12 years of experience before starting my own consulting firm.” “I can’t expect to reach a certain level of success because I am too young.” “Maturity only comes with age.“
Bluh bluh bluh…
Stop imposing such limitations on yourself just because everyone else seem to be abiding by them.
Try surprising yourself sometimes… give yourself that opportunity and that freedom to break free of social restrictions.
Heck, try setting NEW social norms
Here’s to a great 2011!
Stop Being a Wuss and Just Do It
Posted by: | CommentsHello boys and girls, did you miss me? 
Man oh man… what a weekend in Las Vegas.
I just got back from the Live the Dream Event hosted by my boyz from MyLeadSystemPro and it was one gangsta of an event!
Given the facts that:
- I got in a day early on Thursday (the event didn’t start till Friday) so we can go party it up
- Unlike No Excuses Summit I was NOT one of the hosts (I was just one of the sponsors)
I partied-hearty both at the event and well, after too
I don’t want to go into TOO much details here (you can add me on FaceBook, Raymond Fong if you want to get a feel for the sort of debauchery that took place…) but yeah… let’s just say I have a love-hate relationship with Las Vegas (I guess I should clarify so I don’t piss off the locals TOO much… instead of “Las Vegas” I should say “The Strip”).
Anyway, good company, good venue, and good times.
Now, I did get pulled aside on more than a few occasions for interviews. And when folks ask me for “advice” (on how to find success in their businesses) I find myself playing like a broken record giving the same in-your-face response, “take action“.
Simple as that.
Living the Dream vs. Just Dreaming
The event was called, “Live the Dream” and it showcased a star-studded class of speakers who’s “made it”. They’ve achieved a level of success that many can only “dream of”. But they didn’t get there by just “dreaming” it, they actually took action to accompany their dreams.
They each had different stories, different paths they took to get to where they are today. Some had rag-to-riches stories, like David Wood who literally started his journey living in a van (down by the river) with ~$45 to his name. Brian Fanale who started as a musician who, as you may well know, make little to no money and as a musician he did some umm… herbal stuff quite a bit, and absolutely refused to get a corporate job. Mike Dillard had to eat ramen and sell of some of his most beloved possessions while busing tables. Schwind once held down three jobs just to make ends meet.
Then you have me, who well, my only claim to fame was being an immigrant who hated my $85,000+ a year job… not quite your “rag” part of the rags-to-riches story but here’s my point: you take a look at ANY of us, folks who are leaders of this industry… you’ll draw one commonality.
We all took massive action!
We all suffered and toiled for years trying to make it.
We all did away with any and all sort of lame excuses… Excuses like, “Oh I’m tried.” “But Law and Order is on tonight.” “My friends are out drinking and invited me.“
And don’t even get me started on some folks’ excuses, “I just don’t know if I can do what you do – I am just not as ‘talented.’“
For crying out loud, which one of us has a marketing degree? Heck, which one of us actually studied business in school and gotten a MBA? Which one of us came from a “writing” background which helps with copywriting?
As a matter of fact, I came from the opposite of all of that. I was trained to STFU, sit in a cube, don’t question anybody, and do my thing quietly as a miserable computer engineer. I was trained to think purely logically and not emotionally (the OPPOSITE of copywriting).
I was an introvert who didn’t enjoy nor know how to socialize for crying out loud! +/-»
Point is, we all took massive action and did whatever it took to achieve the type of lifestyle we all craved for.
What’s Stopping You?
And frankly you can too.
It may not be marketing. But if you KNOW what you have and are doing now aren’t for you, then isn’t it at the very least worth the effort to try something else?
Sure, you might not know how to do what it is that you desire to do but you can learn right?
Sure, you might fail, but you have time to get up and try again right?
How badly do you want change? Like the saying goes…
The pain of NOT changing has to be greater than the pain of changing for a person to change.
How painful is your lack of change? If it’s enough for you to dream of better times and to wish for better times… I’d say it’s time you do something, anything, don’t you think?
Stop thinking about it, stop “action-lessly” dreaming about it… and just freakin’ do it.
To you achieving your dreams,
S***ty Customers Need Not Apply
Posted by: | CommentsOkay, so this will ruffle some feathers.
I’m gonna get some hate mail about how I shouldn’t cuss. How I should be PC and say, “Poopy Customers Need Not Apply” instead of use the word “shitty”.
I’m going to get people angry at me for being so front and come across as so mean-spirited and maybe even callous.
Some people will hate on me and say, “But Ray! Customers are ALWAYS right!“
Baloney.
Forget that… I’ve gone through my share of customers and I can tell you they are NOT always right.
Don’t get me wrong, I have some AMAZING, absolutely AWESOME clients and customers – kudos to them. I am talking more about the “few rotten apples“.
Behind the Scenes
In an industry where every “guru” at one time or another has been called a “scam” by somebody, one thing we fail to contemplate is… while everyone is busy evaluating us gurus as “scammers”, do we ever give any thought as to how some customers are scammers themselves? They are scamming us gurus.
Let me explain.
And no, it’s not just folks who sing me praises who get my respect. You see, there are folks who also are clients of mine who haven’t, for one reason or another, gotten their full desired results YET. However, they also know that the responsibility to achieve success ultimately rests on them – so instead of blaming everyone else, they take it upon themselves and own up to their own shortcomings.
What I am talking about are customers with
- the entitlement attitude
- the victim mentality
The Entitlement Attitude
The society, not just “customers” within our industry, is plagued by this disease. They feel like the world, and everybody else, owe them something. They feel that just because they did A, they deserve B.
And if they don’t get hooooo boy, better watch out world! Here comes a tantrum fit! Like little kids they’ll kick and scream, they’ll hold their breath until they turn blue in the face, they’ll cry until they have no more tears.
*shakes head*
We get customers like this sometimes. For whatever the reason, they think that by handing us money for our education, they are entitled to success and riches beyond their wildest dreams.
Never mind that they never even bothered to take off the shrink wrap on our course. They let our course sit, unopened and untouched… right alongside every single other course from every single other leaders they they’ve also never opened.
And when success doesn’t come knocking, their hate-email start flowing. They want nothings short of us to do the work for them and to GET them their success. Because after all… they did buy our course, aren’t they entitled to the same success and riches other (hard-working and ambitious) students of ours got for themselves?
The Victim Mentality
Hoo boy, this one gets me going.
You know what I am talking about, the type of folks who blame everybody and everything else for what’s happening in THEIR lives. They abdicate all form of responsibilities for their own lives and instead, seek for forces outside their control to be responsible and to blame.
And they’ll take whatever they can get. They’ll point their dirty little fingers at anything and everyone.
No scapegoat is beyond their reach.
Including us
I mean, OF COURSE it’s our fault that you bought our course and never used it which is why you didn’t get any results!
OF COURSE we are a scam because we sold you a course that’s helped many others achieve their success, wealth, and freedom but for whatever reason, it didn’t help you (never mind that it’s the SAME course…)
OF COURSE we are to shoulder the blame for you getting laid off, your wife leaving you, and your dog running away – it makes total sense that our course caused all of that…
But it’s still doesn’t make it okay for you to ROB US (which some have pretty much have done…)
The Real Culprit…
So before you bitch about another product you bought, realize this:
- Ultimately, YOU bought it, no one forced you to make that purchase. This is what refund policy is for.
- Odds are, assuming you got it from a reputable source, that product has already helped improve others’ lives, and that same product didn’t change. The only thing that’s different between you and your failure to extract success from that product and the person who WAS able to get value from the product, is YOU.
So let’s make a deal. We’ll continue to serve you, educate you, and help you in the manners we know best. And you be honest with yourself (and us) and do your very best to fully leverage our education and pave your path to success.
If you’ve been a loyal good customers, awesome! Heck, even if you’ve never given me a single dime but are living your life with honor, integrity, and dignity, good for you. We’d get along.
But if you are absolutely stubborn at being a s***y customer (or just an a-hole), pleases leave me alone, I don’t want your business, I don’t need your business, and you and I absolutely won’t get along k?
Much love,
Raymond
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